Moving Abroad: Experiences from Richmond Students

Moving abroad can seem daunting, especially for young students who, for the first time, will be living hundreds or thousands of miles from their families in countries completely foreign to them. The anxiety of this change can nearly stop you in your tracks. I know when I first thought about moving, it was a weird mix of excitement and doom. I didn’t like the uncertainty behind it all. How I didn’t know the best food spots, or how to get places, or where to get a job. I would be starting over, completely, and it was terrifying.

Over the years, my anxiety eased, and I got into the swing of things. I found the best food spots, got a job, and memorised the Piccadilly Line. I was amazed at how much easier that would’ve been if I had just known a little bit about life here before.

That’s why I decided to talk to some of the other international students here and get their perspectives on their challenges and triumphs. Every international kid I’ve seen is in the same boat. We’re all not from here, trying not to get lost, and finding our way together. I talked with Aryan Gupta and Rudraraj Gohil, fellow undergrads, about their experiences here. I hope it’ll shine a little light on international life here at Richmond. And maybe if someone is considering moving from India, or America, or anywhere else to here, maybe it can ease their doubts.

Well, to start off, Aryan is from Delhi, India, and Rudraraj is from Gujarat. And I am from Colorado in the US. I was 18-years-old when I moved. They both moved here when they were 17-years-old and 18-years-old and immediately immersed themselves in a completely new world. I asked Rudraraj what the hardest part of moving so young was.

He jokingly replied, “[a]djusting to the, well, I still haven’t adjusted fully, but adjusting to the manners of British people.”

Aryan agreed, adding, “I think the most difficult part was the winters. It gets dark at 3 PM, so it’s very depressing.”

I’ve encountered this shock as well. Learning to live in darkness and not give my whole days story when people ask, “You alright love?” I still give a lenthy rant sometimes. (Spoiler, the correct answer is just to give a “Ya, you alright?” back. Trust me.)

We chatted a bit more about the challenges of living in London, of not having a car anymore and affording insane rent prices. The cost of living crisis is hitting everyone hard, including international students.

As Rudraraj put it, “after a certain time, in order to fund your lifestyle costs, like going out to pubs, drinking, and stuff like that, asking your parents for money just sounds a bit, it just feels wrong.”

I think all international students understand the problem well. I hate to say it, but finding a job as an international kid on a visa that restricts your working hours makes it very difficult to do much of anything. I can’t work as much as I want which means I am eternally broke. I do get to focus on my studies, but some events have to be sacrificed for groceries. This is the reality of living abroad, there are some things your get to do because you are here. But it may mean sacrificing some things your are accustomed to at home.

I asked them if there were things they cannot do here that they could do back home. And if it was difficult to miss out on those things while here.

Rudraraj replied, “Yes, it is actually. Because you know, I see my brother, my friends, and everyone going golfing and clubbing.”

“Yeah, that’s one of the parts. Like in, for example, back at home, we were not at home usually at like 6 PM. We were not at home. We’re members of like, lifestyle country clubs and everything. I missed that”, Aryan adds.

I then asked them if there were moments where they wished they were home. I know everytime something happens at home, I get a twinge of homesickness knowing I can’t be there. Even in crises or tense moments I wished I could be back with my family, just so that I know I’m closeby.

“More than that actually,” Rudraraj notes, “ I wish I could be there when my grandparents died. I was here then, and like all the fun stuff as well, like birthdays and stuff.”

Aryan adds, “I’ll say is, just the weddings, because attending a wedding was very nice because they were like, super grand.”

“I haven’t been to a wedding in like four, or three years. Yeah, and that’s rare in India. I haven’t been to any wedding, and in India usually like over a wedding season, we have a wedding season in winter. I would say I go to roughly twenty weddings, and they are super.” Rudraraj remarks, “[w]e go to loads of weddings and then suddenly its like nothing.”

“Yeah, Indian weddings are massive!” Aryan chimes in. “Dang. I miss when like, all of the cousins get there and they’re like posting selfies or something.”

I said I was a bit jealous of that. I’ve only ever been to two weddings in my whole life. And only one I remember. I can’t imagine twenty in a season. Of course, I had to include the necessary pivot of why they came to study in London. What could they of experienced here that makes it so worth it?

They both noted that Halloween is not a big celebration at home, so the costume pub crawl was quite memorable for them. Rudraraj adds that there’s also just acertain freedom in being a student here that they couldn’t get anywhere else.

“ I live here alone, so it’s not like I have to get home at a certain time. So I can be out all night, hang around with friends and stuff like that.”

I agree with him here. The feeling of freedom, living in an international city, away from home for the first time, is unmatched. I feel like a completely new person. I still call my parents every week though.

Aryan added that studying in London specifically gives you something that nowher else in the country can. He remarks, “I have got many friends which are not living here, like basically not living in London. They are living on the Oxford site. And he’s like, he always wants to come to go clubbing. London is a completely different life, right? They know the importance of being in London.”

Rudraraj adds, “Yeah, it’s not just clubbing. I feel like you get a lot more perspective from different people. Like, I was never really nervous, but I never would’ve considered myself going into a deep conversation with a Japanese guy or someone else like that.”

I understand the sentiment. That is one of the best things about London as an International Relations student, I can have a conversation about my topics of study with anyone from anywhere, and get their take on it. I’ve attended Ukrainian society meetings at KCL to hear discussions on the war effort, gone to Westminster to hear Parliamentary discussions on world affairs, attended talks by Bosnian genocide survivors, met people who are active in shaping the outcomes of their country. I couldn’t of done any of that at home. Not to mention just simply becoming friends with people from all over the world. That may be the most crucial development of my university career. Just talking with people and understanding them. Everyone is here in London.

When I asked them what convinced them to stay in London, despite the challenges, they both said, “Everything apart from the weather.”

I’d have to agree (although summers are lovely here). I asked them to recount some of their favorite memories of London to me. They listed a whole bunch of things, including trying Guinness for the first time, looking at deer in Richmond, meeting people from different cultures (and each other), teaching each other Garba for Navratri, and celebrating birthdays with friends.

Finally, I asked “If you could do it over, would you still choose London?”

“Yes.”